bleugh

I had chemo again on friday and had a chit chat about the PET screw up. My consultant couldn't 100% guarantee which PET was right/wrong if it in fact either were mine but he's pretty sure the one showing no more cancer is the right now. I had a look at it myself but couldn't really make much sense of it. So it's pretty much wait 2 more cycles, have another PET and see what it says then. My hope is that in 1 month and 10 days I will be vomiting from my last ever chemo!!

So I was told to take ativan (2mg) before my chemo on Friday and some other sedative. I vomited twice whilst the chemo was going on (god I hate chemo) and felt like shit. But slept for most of the weekend and don't really recall much of what happened. Today (Monday) I didn't take any sedatives (mainly because they make me too drowsy and then emotional when I wake up confused and disorientated) and have felt pretty nauseated all day. I'm wearing travel sickness bands but they're pretty useless. funny thing is I seem to need to eat more for the first few days after chemo and that helps with the nausea if I eat stodge like bread. not sure why. All I know is hunger make my nausea worse (I'm not normal).

My mouth is starting to get sore and I'm having hot flushes again but hey ho.

I have discovered that marks and spencer do fantastic lingerie for my bloated chemo body. Nice and comfy. Makes me feel less so stodgy. And the puppy is the best puppy in the world now. She's adorable and comes and cuddles me when I'm sad and is toilet trained and loving.

My boyfriend and I are going to Pula on Saturday for 3 days just to get away for a bit - will be nice. Hopefully sunshine, ice cream, pizza and beaches :) Then back in time for blood tests and more chemo. Yay!!!!

I can't begin to say how fed up I am. My emotions have been up and down and I've just had enough. But I'm getting there and I'll get through this.... slowly but surely.